Toronto ON — Desperate to put a rough week behind her, Andrea Horwath spent the day trying to find anything to take the heat off her and her party.
One of the best ways to shed negative attention is to pass it on to someone else. She was certain that if she followed Doug Ford around all day, eventually he would do something boneheaded enough to draw the ire of Ontario citizens.
Ideally she would like him to say something outrageous but after the black caucus fiasco and with her leadership coming under scrutiny just months before an election, she would accept just seeing Ford throw his Egg McMuffin wrapper on the ground.
She thought she had something earlier in the week when it was announced Dr. Kieran Moore took a personal vacation during the sixth wave of the pandemic but the outrage didn’t quite gain traction because too many idiots think it’s okay to take vacations from their job.
After spending Thursday following him around, watching his every move, all she had was one last grasping at the straws. “Jaywalk or something you bastard,” she whispered to herself. Just one illegal crossing would make her day after all, can we really trust a leader who doesn’t cross at the lights?
Unfortunately, nothing happened but with a holiday weekend on tap, there is still a chance he does something there. Maybe he will be caught sneaking a Starbucks on the day we celebrate the death of Christ. That would definitely be something.
